Fast Track Attracting Back Your Ex With Attachment Styles

I do not have a one-fits-all generic program, method or system for how to get back with your ex. I prefer to work one-on-one because: 1) no two relationships are the same and 2) what I’m really good at is understanding the unique dynamic between two people and help change the dynamic to where the relationship meets BOTH people’s attachment needs and BOTH people feel safe.

What makes me different from many other get your ex back coaches is:

1) I use attachment styles as a tool for getting back an ex

Attachment theory is no ‘magic wand” or be-it-all because we’re more than our attachment style, but attachment theory in my opinion is the most accurate science-based relationship framework to date. In my decades of helping exes get back together, I’ve seen more people get back together with the help of attachment styles than ever before. If you’re well-educated on attachment styles, you’re already steps ahead in the process.

2) I do not advice using or going “no contact” to get an ex back

I’m just going to put it put there, so you can make an informed decision as to whether to work with me or not. Most coaches advice “not contact” to get and ex back, I do not advice going “no contact” with an ex – anxious, secure or avoidant – you want back (you can read my reasons here).

It’s much easier to get an ex to change their mind about coming back when you approach them from a secure attachment: 1) a desire to be a loving person and an attitude of caring, 2) showing up consistently, 3) open lines of communication and 4) honest and direct communication.

And if you are trying to get back and an anxiously attached or fearful avoidant ex, sometimes what they need to change their mind is for you to prove that they’re worth fighting for and you not going to cut and run with the first opportunity.

3) I do not believe in tricks or manipulation

I do not see attachment styles as a “set of tricks” to use to get an ex back. I use attachment styles as a tool to provide safety, security, care, love; and for personal growth.

The biggest difference working with me is that there is no manipulation, mind games or trickery. You will feel good about yourself knowing you approached things from a secure attachment, and your ex came back because they love you and want to be with you, and not because you manipulated or tricked them into coming back. And you’ll continue to feel confident and secure in and with your relationship after you get back together.

4) I help create safe and secure relationships 

I believe that a relationship is healthy, safe and secure only if both people feel their needs are met. I do not believe that if you have an anxious attachment that you should “give an avoidant all the space they need” and sacrifice your need for connection just to be with an avoidant. I also do not believe that if you are an avoidant you should be made to feel guilty for needing your space from time to time. Anxiously attachment need connection to feel safe while avoidants need space to feel safe, and both needs can be met within a relationship.

What I do is help you 1) create a healthy balance between connection and giving yourselves enough space to work through your individual issues, and issues in the relationship and 2) help you create clear and healthy boundaries that will help both of you feel safe.

5) I work with you to help you become more securely attached

I’m a relationship coach and not a personal development coach, meaning, I don’t specifically work on how to change your attachment style, instead I work with you to help you consistently model secure attachment  behaviours and practice being safe and providing safety in a relationship. You not only learn what secure thinking, feeling and behaviour is, you also get to practice it in real-world situations. Over time you find that you are becoming more and more secure in the way you perceive, emotionally process and respond to your ex and to different experiences and situations.

6) I help you transform your relationship for the better

The focus of my work is not just to help you get back together with your ex or “get along” with an avoidant for example. My goal is to permanently end an anxious-avoidant dynamic by helping you approach attracting back your ex from a secure perspective so you can change an anxious-avoidant dynamic to a healthier and secure dynamic.

I know from experience that as long as both of you still have attachment related triggers, you will always have problems related to your attachment styles. I’ll help you manage these triggers better as you work on getting back with your ex and over time permanently end the anxious-avoidant dynamic.

I’m happy to answer any questions you may have about your ex’s attachment style and what you can do to successfully get back together; AND also answer any questions on how to become more secure in your thinking and responses, and gradually change your internal working model and attachment scripts.

7) In me, you have a coach, secure base and friend

I do my best to understand your relationship and attachment dynamics and keep you grounded so you are focused on the bigger picture and end game. I try as much as time allows to be the secure base support that is consistently available to you in a meaningful and authentic way through phone sessions and email coaching.

My personal belief is that if I can accurately reflect back to you your emotional experience in a way that makes you feel understood and safe to reach out, connect and engage your ex in a positive way, and with the work you are doing on yourself, you will be less anxious or less avoidant and freer to experiment your new behaviours and a securely attached way of relating with your ex.

Next steps:

  1. Select your region
  2. Choose the package that’s best for you
  3. Make payment
  4. Fill the form to set up your appointment
  5. Reply to email to confirm appointment day/time
  6. I will call you.

If you have any questions about our coaching packages, text 1+416 606 6989 or WhatsApp: +1416 606 6989